Who are you?
My name is Mark Sultan. I am also known as BBQ, but not BBQ Show, as well as Blortz, Bridge Mixture, Creepy and a million other pointless names. I am a regular on TV’s ‘Eight Is Enough’. You may know me from my time in The Spaceshits, Les Sexareenos, BBQ, The Ding-Dongs, Mind Controls, Ciaoculos, Mark Sultan, The Almighty Defenders and The King Khan & BBQ Show. I was, luckily, not featured in any recent ‘Garage Rock’ ‘documentaries’. I love chocolate and pizza. I used to burn down churches, and I participated in the 1997 Olympic Games. I am also a Medium and a Magician.
Who are you wearing?
I am wearing the same shit I have worn for nearly 20 years. I am hobosensual.
What are the chance of a Spaceshits reunion?
Chances of a Spaceshits reunion would be 10% or π, depending on the season. We are all friends who talk, but for two of the absolute original members. And I think we are too old. Sounds fun, though.
Who is your favorite doo-wop artist?
My favourite singer, in general, is Carlis Munroe, at the moment and possibly forever. I dislike Dion.
What is the most annoying thing people say to you about you being a one man band?
Being a one-man band is very unfortunate. If you deviate from monotony/stale, shticky, formulaic crud, you are somehow ‘not rock’n’roll’. Being automatically compared to what everyone envisions a ‘one-man band’ to be or to sound like, no matter what you do, is like comparing the Abba to Slayer, cuz both have four members. I dislike that some folks who just think they ‘can do it’ do it, without repercussion for their misguided confidence. It’s not fun when a promoter slides the payscale low because you are just one person in the band, as though the people you brought in to the show and the time you spent ‘entertaining’ was moot. Also, breaking up onstage is very awkward. And so is pissing your bandmate’s pants.
If you were a poutine, what would be in it?
If I were a poutine, I would be the classic crispy-on-the-outside, tender in the middle, peanut-oil-fried-potatoes with squeaky, Quebec curds and a homemade, slightly pepper-y gravy. Sometimes with smoked meat. And occasionally forgoing it all for meat sauce a l’Italienne.
Note to my US friends: please do not put krinkle cut fries, white gravy or orange curds in your poutine. It saddens some of us up here.
What are the guidelines to have a good time at a Mark Sultan show?
I think you will have a good time at my show if you know that I mean to give you my heart and you accept that idea. It’s fun when people stop posturing for a sec and dance or kiss or whatever, to love rock’n’roll with me. If you are expecting ‘swamp blues’ or guitar virtuosity or are afraid of someone emoting, stay home. But if you wanna succumb to old energies with me, to laugh with ghosts and puke with reverie, we can spend an hour or so in absolute removal, vibrating. Then we can talk about shitting or Tom Hanks, get drunk at the bar and laugh like buffoons.
Reading this back, it’s clear: to have fun, you really have to not think like me. I am boring.
Is rock n roll dead?
I think my idea of what rock’n’roll ‘is’ or ‘was’ is dead to ME, to an extent. I think some folks DO keep it alive. But I don’t even know what it is anymore…90’s retro grunge? Note-by-note retro-xeroxing? Copious reverb? Cool clothes? Club memberships? Is music itself now a visual medium, synesthesically deceiving itself to approval-seekers? Who cares what I think, anyway? I am the unhip. I’ll always be listening to the music I love and being a square until the next wave hits and it starts again, I guess.
Who would be in your all-star band?
My all-star band would not contain me or anyone I know. It would be unknown kids truly and enthusiastically playing music that makes anyone who listens wanna drink, fight and fuck, simultaneously.
What is your message for the kids?
Don’t listen to me. Always do what you wanna do. Love life. Destroy.
And please don’t ask me if The King Khan & BBQ Show is ever going to tour again!
IT IS NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN.
Listen to Mark Sultan here:
Mark Sultan on The Internet
MARK SULTAN (BBQ) NORTH AMERICAN SUPER JAUNT
26th - Providence, RI - Dusk
27th - Manhattan, NYC - Boat Show
30th - Durham, NC - Motorco
31st - Asheville, NC - The Get Down
1st - Atlanta, GA - Star Bar
3rd – New Orleans, LA - Siberia
5th - Austin, TX - Beerland
8th - Las Vegas, NV - Beauty Bar
9th - Desert Hot Springs, CA - Dillon’s Roadhouse
10th - Los Angeles, CA - Blue Star
12th - Monterey, CA - Golden State Theatre
13th - San Francisco, CA - The Knockout
16th - Seattle, WA - Rendezvous
17th - Vancouver, BC - Astoria
19th - Calgary, AB - The Commonwealth
20th - Edmonton, AB - Wunderbar
22nd - Winnipeg, MN - Windsor Hotel
23rd - Fargo, ND - The Aquarium
24th - St Paul, MN - Turf Club **
26th - Chicago, IL - Empty Bottle **
28th - Omaha, NE - The Slowdown **
29th – Iowa City, IA – The Mill **
30th - St Louis, MO - Off Broadway **
1st - Bloomington, IN - Russian Recording**
3rd – Nashville, TN – Exit/In**
4th - Columbus, OH – Ace Of Cups**
5th - Ann Arbor, MI – Blind Pig**
7th - Brooklyn, NY - Union Pool
8th - Boston, MA – Spacelab
15th – Montreal, QC – Casa del Popolo
** as ‘The King Khan & BBQ Show’
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